SMWA The Final Update

    Sometimes, circumstances just suck.
    When the SMWA first started, it was nothing more than a form of personal stress relief. First, it was just a story that I wrote. I then acquired a computer program (Pro Wrestling Promoter) that allowed me to sim the matches. Upgrading from PWP to Rampage Wrestling and, finally, TNM, I was able to make my escape, the SMWA, into something of a personal dream. A story I wanted to tell to somebody. Anybody. All I needed was the forum.
    It was at that point that the TNM list started up. I saw other people posting about their feds, their creations, the things that came from the corners of their imaginations. I liked it. I liked the idea that people who knew absolutely nothing about each other could share their ideas, their imaginations, with one another, providing entertainment for all. It was at that point that I somewhat casually mentioned my own created fed. Starting with a little bit of hype for an old, forgotten video game and the exports it inspired, I seemed to catch something within a few people. It seemed that I got imaginations flowing, minds working overtime. I had my forum.
    Thus, the SMWA was "born".
    It's weird. When I look back at what I was passing off as SMWA cards when I started this whole thing off, I feel kind of ashamed. By the standards I have set for myself now, I had kind of been slacking. How, do you ask? My initial cards were short, sweet and simple, yet for some reason, they caught the attention of people. Jack Slade was a character that I barely had the time to flesh out, yet people became fans of his. People hated Chad Hillsman because of simple descriptions of his actions. Ultimate Spider, a man who had nothing but a name, grew a small following. In retrospect, I still can't understand it.
    I look back at what I did then, and then I look at what I've done to myself now. Crash Carnival '98, my "biggest card ever", is smaller than the average Saturday Night Slam Masters in length. Jack Slade's character has been fleshed out into somebody more complex than I could ever imagine. Chad Hillsman's actions are no longer simple descriptions, but full-blown sketches in evil. Ultimate Spider is no longer just a name. The SMWA became bigger. It became better. The fan base became broader. However, in that time, I felt as if I had lost something along the way.
    The fun.
    Now, don't get me wrong; putting out a finalized card and having people actually give a damn is great. Having people actually care about something I originally put together at about three in the morning one August night while playing a video game is really quite thrilling. It would be enough to satisfy the ego of any man out there. It would want to make anybody keep writing. At least, you'd think so.
    Again, something got lost along the way.
    It's odd. Just watching an SMWA match on my TNM can be more fun than writing it. When I watched the Mike Haggar vs Rick Clark match that I wrote for Thanksgiving Thunder '98, I was literally out of breath. Something as simple as two simulated wrestlers I created in my head had me out of breath. I was (and still am) a little bit weirded out by the situation. When I wrote the match for Thanksgiving Thunder, I had that feeling once more. A similar feeling, anyway. A diluted sense of euphoria. A deja vu which didn't make it as special the second time around. Something different.
    Alas, there's the rub.
    I've played the SMWA up until Crash Carnival '99. I know the card, the matches, the results and how they all went down. Let me tell you, it's the best card I've ever seen anyplace, TNM or otherwise, and I'm being bashful when I say that. Scorpion vs Haggar. Skarzz vs Slade. Sky vs Clark. The Eastern Powers vs The All-Americans. It makes every WrestleMania look like an edition of Livewire. It is awesome.
    It probably will never be seen written in it's entirety.
    As of this moment, the SMWA is officially closed for business.
    This isn't an easy decision for me. Even now, I don't know what to say. I kind of feel like I'm breaking a promise, with "SMWA 4 Ever!!!" effectively now being an empty slogan. But it's something I have to do for a few reasons.
    First, there's the practical side. I'm a third year University student doing a double major in Communications Studies and English. I'm a member of a Fraternity, Pi Kappa Alpha, where I am in charge of our ritual, our newsletter and our soon-to-be-website. I'm part of the campus walk home program and am actively involved in drama at the school. Add that to a social life, without which I'd explode. Then there's also the SMWA. With all that on my plate, something had to go.
    Why did it have to be the SMWA? Even right now, I'm asking myself that question. The answer, in the end, is somewhat of a selfish one, but one I'm sticking to.
    All those years ago, the SMWA started up as something for me. Something I'd do to pass the time. A way of personal catharsis. My escape. My way of having fun. When I made the SMWA "public" I couldn't have imagined the response I'd get. When I got it, I liked it, and I wanted to make the SMWA bigger and bigger. I wanted it to soar. I think I achieved that goal. However, I achieved it by sacrificing a lot of my time and, truthfully, a lot of myself. It was a sacrifice I enjoyed, but one I no longer feel I can make.
    The SMWA will live on, in a way. I'll still be watching Jack Slade fighting the good fight. I'll experience the ups and downs of StB. I'll get pissed off at Saul Masters. Unfortunately, it's only going to be me doing that. The only way to keep the SMWA alive is to keep it to myself.
    Below, I'm going to go into the details of what becomes of the SMWA as it is now. The results of Showdown. The lead up to Crash Carnival and, finally, Crash Carnival '99 itself. If you've read this far and want to keep going, please do. At the end of the recap, I'll have my final words on the SMWA and for all of you out there who have followed it.
    Well, here we go.

Slam Masters: Showdown

The Cruiserweight Battle Royal

Before the match even begins, Paul Milo lets everybody know exactly why he hijacked the SMWA internet station last Massacre: He put the body parts of Teddy up for sale on eBay. With the URL posted during the event, bidding starts almost immediately. During the match, Paul Milo becomes the target of choice and, contrary to what may seem like the proper booking choice, is actually eliminated quite early from the contest. However, Milo makes sure to distract Rokuru, who ends up getting eliminated as Milo talks about the bids on Teddy. The Battle Royal rages on, and eventually, four unlikely men make it to the finals - the members of Fuerza Dragon, Spoon Man, and Gestalt. Actor is accidentally eliminated by his partner. Gestalt, who had actually eliminated quite a few wrestlers during the match, including Rokuru, tosses Spoon Man. Fuego enters the ring after arguing with Actor on the floor and soon finds himself tossed!
Gestalt is the new Cruiserweight Champion, but he doesn't even have a chance to put the belt around his waist. Paul Milo charges to the ring, chair in hand, and does a number on Gestalt. The new champ is saved by Rokuru, but not before Milo makes an escape with the Cruiserweight Title.

The Baki Mono vs Team Deadline

As is the norm with this feud, things get crazy. Zuzanow is the first to get eliminated in this contest. Then, he actually gets eliminated! After a fantastic light show in the middle of the match, Zuzanow quite literally vanishes, never to be seen again. Teioh is the next to go. He doesn't vanish. Instead, he receives the same treatment that the Dark Storm received weeks earlier, being turned against the Baki Mono by Deadline. So, it's three on one, Amatsu Mikaboshi being the lone man left. He dominates up until a point, but then Deadline begins to assert himself. Knowing the end may be near, Zists and Iznami do the unthinkable. They call down a lightning bolt, which hits Deadline square in the chest, practically igniting him. Oni, NightClaw and Teioh force the Baki Mono away, keeping them from inflicting more damage. Somehow, after all of that, Deadline is okay. His team takes the win by DQ, with Deadline anxious now not only to defend his "realm", but to get a heap of revenge against Amatsu.

Andrew Marshall vs "Titan" Tim Redbury vs The Dark Brand

West Bronco does exactly what he promised to do - remain an impartial non-participant, ensuring that nobody comes to the ring. The match itself is mostly dominated by Andrew Marshall, who puts forth the effort of his career. Unfortunately, any time he'd have Titan or Brand ready to be beat, the other would make the save, wanting to settle their feud personally. After having nearly won the match umpteen times, Marshall finally falls prey to being caught in the middle of the Brand/Titan feud. Titan does away with him with a big Claw Slam. This sets up Titan vs Bronco for the North American Title at Crash Carnival, and it also sets up a damn angry Andrew Marshall, who takes his anger out on the first man he sees - The Dark Brand.

Simply the Best vs Highland Hell & ??? vs All-American & Doomsday
vs Rasta & Eastern Powers

How does Terry Sky figure in? Simple. Rick Clark did, effectively, terminate his contract. However, Sky had a clause in his contract which gave him one more date to wrestle after termination to, as Sky puts it, "tie up loose ends". The clause had been there for a while, but Rick Clark never even bothered to read the contract. In effect, this was a big FU to Clark, giving Sky what appeared to be the final word in their feud. Doomsday, it should be noted, did not bring the kidnapped Bobby to the match, telling Rasta he'd get Bobby back when he was good and ready. The All-Americans do away with the Eastern Powers, but then are themselves eliminated when Biff comes back to help Highland Hell. This sets up Highland Hell & Sky vs StB, a battle in which Sky gets the deciding fall, hitting the Lights Out on Ron Grayson. Immediately after the pin, Sky leaves the ring, grabs the mic and tells Rick Clark that, now and forever more, he had the last laugh.

Counterstrike vs Major Force

    The drama starts early in the card on this one, when Jack McCullough, at the urging of Scorpion, punishes Counterstrike for showing up late to the card (Haggar claims there was a mix up with cars at the airport). McCullough decides that the best punishment is to keep Jessica Haggar away from the ring during the match. Jessica protests, but McCullough stays firm. Later in the card, we hear an argument behind closed doors between McCullough, Masters and Scorpion. Then we see Ghost talking to a security guard who is posted outside the Counterstrike dressing room. The confusion backstage is running high, and finally we have the main event. It is a tumultuous fight, but we keep getting distracted by what is going on in the dressing room. The match ends, Kodiak Marmoset getting the duke over Alexander "The Grater" after some chicanery, and then Major Force cuts loose. Grater is down. Slade is put down. Simmons is put down. Haggar is the only man left in the ring, and he experiences the beatdown of a lifetime. There is a shot of the Counterstrike dressing room. The door is open, and Jessica Haggar is gone! She shows up at ringside, quite literally fighting off Jack McCullough, who is trying desperately to keep her from the ring. With her father now handcuffed to the ropes and being beat on horribly, that isn't even an option. Jessica tries to get the other members of Counterstrike up, but all are badly injured and Kodiak has taken the time to handcuff them outside the ring. Then, the unthinkable happens.
    Ghost goes outside and grabs Jessica Haggar. She tries to fight him off, but Ghost nails her with a backhand.   Jessica is tossed into the ring, and Scorpion makes sure Mike Haggar is awake. Skarzz gets a hold of Jessica Haggar. Skarzz attacks Jessica Haggar, nailing her with choke slams, power bombs, the Skarring. Jessica Haggar is beaten down in front of her father as the Scorpion taunts him. Jack McCullough goes to the back and returns with several police officers, who come to the ring, hands on their guns. Scorpion backs his troops away, but it's too late. The damage has been done.
    Jessica Haggar had been beaten within an inch of her life as her father looked on. The last shot we saw was of Mike Haggar, still handcuffed to the ropes, crying his eyes out.

The Next Massacre: Hamilton, Ontario

    To start the show, we see Major Force, thick as thieves, in the parking lot. Ghost gets into a car as Major Force wish him good luck. He then speeds away
    We are informed that Mike Haggar and Jack Slade are currently in Metro Toronto General Hospital, attending to Jessica Haggar, who was still in critical but stable condition. Alexander "The Grater" is in Hamilton, as is Cody Simmons, who is out for blood.
    Major Force shows up in the ring and rubs what they did in everybody's face. It isn't long before Cody Simmons shows up, Grater at his side. Simmons is seething mad, and he demands a shot at Skarzz, wanting to hurt him as badly as he hurt Jessica. Scorpion, simply to torment Cody, denies him that match. However, Cody informs Scorpion that the match has, indeed, been signed. Scorpion reminds Cody who controls the Commissioner and, thus, who controls the booking.
    Out from the back comes Jack McCullough, who, effectively, takes back control. Scorpion gives McCullough one more chance before he ruins him with the secret he's been holding over his head, but McCullough beats him to the punch. Scorpion had photographs of McCullough with a female police officer, years before when McCullough was on the force. McCullough told his wife last night, knowing that he couldn't be blackmailed any longer, realizing that he was in part responsible for what happened to Jessica Haggar the night before. Scorpion calmly congratulates McCullough for coming clean, and then asks Cody how he thinks he'll win without backup tonight. Cody asks what Scorpion means. Scorpion asks Cody how long the drive is from Hamilton to Toronto.
    It becomes clear. Scorpion dispatched Ghost to help finish the job on Jessica Haggar. Cody goes ballistic, but is dragged to the back by Grater and McCullough. Grater volunteers to drive to Toronto to try to help, and soon he's off. The only problem is that Ghost has a twenty minute head start. McCullough calls ahead to TO, and we have the makings of a chase scene I wish I could write up in full.
    A match is held between Biff Slamkovich and Chad Hillsman. Hillsman wins it, sparking a fight between the Powers and the AA. Once the fight is broken up, Hillsman makes a challenge to the Powers. Face him and Gunloc at Crash Carnival, one last time, I quit rules for the SMWA Tag Team Titles. Zangief accepts, warning Hillsman that he'll make him pay in every way for what he did to him at New Year's Smash.
    West Bronco, scheduled for another rematch with NightClaw II, comes out and calls out the TV Champ, Andrew Marshall. Bronco talks to Marshall, stating that they aren't all that different, and it's pretty obvious that both men are fed up with other people sticking their noses in their matches. Bronco suggests a partnership, where the two men stand guard at each others matches, never getting involved, only stopping the interference. Marshall, after some prodding, accepts, telling Bronco he'd be there for him against NightClaw.
    Paul Milo comes out and announces that he's closed bidding on Teddy, with five parts of him being shipped to five separate people. A challenge is made to Gestalt, who accepts and is promptly crushed. Rokuru makes the save, chases Milo away and then offers cash rewards to anybody who can help him put Teddy back together again.
    Amatsu Mikaboshi faces off against the freshly turned Teioh. Teioh lasts a while with help from his new allies, but Amatsu triumphs. He fights off his attackers until Deadline appears, at which point Zists and Iznami help Amatsu bid a hasty retreat.
    StB does an interview. Grayson says that he's focusing everything he has on taking down the Scotsman and showing up Monica's taste in men. However, the real interesting part is when Rick Clark tries to sound unimpressed by what Terry Sky did on Saturday. Sky appears with a microphone, and taunts Clark, needling him, letting him know that he'd never get another chance at revenge against him. Sky claims that, until Clark beats him in the ring, the mental damage left by Clark losing his eye will always serve as a reminder that Sky was the one man he could never outfox. Eventually, Clark loses it. Sky tells Clark he can have revenge at Crash Carnival, only if Sky gets re-instated upon victory. Clark agrees, so long as he gets to book Sky against whomever he wants up until Crash Carnival. Sky agrees, and immediately a match is booked between Sky and Grayson for later in the evening.
    Also, the War Titles are held up for the final time, since Sky is technically wrestling without a contract. Highland Hell don't seem to care, though.
    We go to Toronto, where Alexander "The Grater", arriving with the help of a police escort that Jack McCullough arranged, made record time in arriving at the hospital. The car that Ghost drove to the hospital is seen, but there's no Ghost. Nobody saw him go in the hospital, but everything points to him being there.
    The West Bronco vs NightClaw match starts up. NightClaw told Deadline not to get involved, and he and Oni didn't.
    In the first few minutes of the match, we go back to Toronto, where Grater meets up with Slade and Haggar. Haggar dispatches Slade back to Hamilton, figuring that Grater could keep a cooler head than Slade could if Ghost showed up. Slade isn't happy about helping Cody, but Haggar pretty much chews him out, and Slade is back to Hamilton. In the meantime, there is still no Ghost.
    We near the end of NightClaw/Bronco, and Amatsu decides he'll try to get involved. Andrew Marshall holds him off long enough for Bronco to score a win with the Tombstone. Bronco then comes to fight off Amatsu, but it takes Deadline to finally get the Evil One away. Still, a bond is formed between Bronco and Marshall.
    We go back to the hospital again. Grater is patrolling, while Haggar stays with Jess.
    Sky vs Grayson goes down, with Sky getting the duke, Highland Hell fighting off interference from Clark and Kent.
    Back at the hospital, we catch Grater at a vending machine near Jessica's room. A doctor passes by him, wearing a surgical mask. Grater attacks the doctor, who is revealed to be Ghost. Somehow, in a mess of security and Grater's attack, Ghost managed to escape the scene.
    Back at the arena, Simmons fights the battle of his life against Skarzz, but it's pretty much fifteen minutes of fighting a brick wall. Skarzz takes the match, but Cody is saved by Jack Slade, who gets Major Force away from the ring with the help of McCullough's police escort. Simmons thanks Slade for saving him.

Crash Carnival: The Card
Held in New York City

Steel Cage Match
Mike Haggar vs The Scorpion

SMWA World Title, No-Holds-Barred
Skarzz (C) vs Jack Slade

SMWA Tag Team Titles Match - Submission Rules
The Eastern Powers (C) vs The All-Americans

No-Holds-Barred Grudge Match
Alexander "The Grater" vs Kodiak Marmoset

Twenty Minute Iron Man Match
Rick Clark vs Terry Sky

No-Holds-Barred Grudge Match
Cody Simmons vs Ghost

SMWA North American Title Match
West Bronco (C) vs "Titan" Tim Redbury

Doomsday vs King Rasta

Ron Grayson vs The Flying Scotsman

The Final Battle
Amatsu Mikaboshi vs Deadline

SMWA Television Title Match
Andrew Marshall (C) vs The Dark Brand

The Bear vs The Belt
Rokuru (C) vs Paul Milo

The Lead-Ups

Paul Milo vs Rokuru

An X-Factor enters this feud: Teknos. Tired of not being taken seriously in America, Teknos becomes one of Milo's biggest supporters, helping Milo to victory in a match against Lantern. Teknos tosses his mask and his own luchador heritage aside, claiming he, too, is tired of silly gimmicks. Milo doesn't care, and he attacks Teknos anyway. This sparks what is sort of a three way feud with Teknos, Milo and Rokuru, with Rokuru taking the Cruiserweight Title in a triangle match. It also gets Lantern involved, who condemns Teknos for removing his mask to boost his popularity, sparking a little bit of a spin off feud. Rokuru's search for Teddy reveals one thing - that he was bought for Milo by friends of Milo. However, with the Cruiserweight Title, Rokuru has a bargaining chip. He agrees to put up the belt against Teddy. Milo wins, he keeps Teddy. Rokuru wins, he gets him back.

Deadline vs Amatsu

Things continue to get weirder and weirder in this one. The Dark Storm rename themselves the Kunitsukami and go by their real names, Ken Fujita and Shiro Yazaki. They get involved in a feud with the PXM, who end up being allies of Amatsu for a short time. Naga Yajito is dumped once and for all from the Baki Mono gang. Deadline and Amatsu continue to fight to stand-stills on their road to the final match-up.

West Bronco and Andrew Marshall vs The Dark Brand and Titan Tim

With the new alliance between Bronco and Marshall, who are referred to as "Team No-Respect", Brand and Titan continue to try and get involved in each others' matches. Many of those matches involve either Bronco or Marshall. One week, Titan and Brand become grudging partners against Marshall and Bronco, with Team No-Respect getting the win. Brand and Titan decide to finally go at it on SNSM, with Titan scoring the duke. Brand swears his revenge, but for the time being, the feud stays between Bronco and Titan, that conflict centring on how Titan helped make Bronco the wrestler he is today due to his stint in Titan's Raiders, and Brand vs Marshall, which isn't too deep of a feud and centres mostly on the TV Title.

Ron Grayson vs The Flying Scotsman

It's now Grayson fighting to humiliate the woman who left him, Monica, and boy does he do a good job. Aside from publicly letting audiences know the more "intimate" details of his relationship with Monica, Grayson distributes nude photos he took of Monica to the crowd at one Massacre!!! The pictures find their way onto the internet, further enraging the Scotsman and humiliating Monica. Jerry Kent also runs a lot of interference against Angus Wallace.

Doomsday vs King Rasta

Wanting Bobby back, Rasta challenges Doomsday to a match to headline the first SNSM after Showdown. At that event, the unthinkable happens: Bobby the Monkey turns on Rasta!!! Somehow, Doomsday turned Bobby against his master. The encounter crosses over into the All-Americans/Eastern Powers feud occasionally, but it mostly remains Doomsday and Bobby attacking and humiliating Rasta.

Rick Clark vs Terry Sky

Clark decides to book the hell out of Sky. The match with Grayson, two matches (split) with Jerry Kent and a match against Doomsday! It is in this match that King Rasta and Sky form an alliance, resulting in an eight man tag on the last Massacre before Crash with Clark, The All-Americans and Doomsday facing off against Sky, The Powers and Rasta. One week, Terry Sky is mugged at the airport. Another week, Rick Clark has his wrestling gear switched with Quasar's. It becomes a battle of wits between Clark and Sky, with each man trying to gain a psychological edge over the other before Crash Carnival.

The All-Americans vs The Eastern Powers

More of the same, but with escalating violence. Hillsman hits Zangief with a car after luring him to the parking lot in a falls-count-anywhere match. Zangief tosses Hillsman down a flight of stairs during a similar match between Biff and Hillsman. Things get more and more vicious, and ever time these teams meet there is a blatant attempt to injure the other, thus making chances of success at Crash Carnival better.

The Major Force vs Counterstrike Feud

Jessica Haggar and her boys

Its a little sub-plot that goes on as Counterstrike and Major Force war. Even though Cody and Slade are grudgingly getting along, their arguments continue to be a problem for Counterstrike. Eventually, Mike Haggar has had enough. He assigns both of them to Toronto to watch over Jessica. Throughout their whole time there, Slade and Cody bicker, until a somewhat recovered Jessica tells them both to grow up. Ghost arrives at the hospital, and Cody and Slade manage to fight him off. Ghost is put in police custody for trespassing. Scorpion later makes bail. Jessica tells both guys that, if they keep acting the way they are, she'll have nothing to do with either of them. It's a plot that isn't resolved before Crash Carnival, that's for darn sure.

Ghost sightings

Ghost returns for a tag match against Cody and Slade, but the other weeks after that and up until Crash Carnival, he stalks Toronto, letting Jessica Haggar know he's around.

Alexander "The Grater" vs Kodiak Marmoset

Let's not forget, it was Kodiak who secured the victory for Major Force by pinning Grater at Showdown. Kodiak, in fact, makes sure we don't forget, taunting Grater at every turn. He takes time the night that Grater rushes to the hospital to challenge him to a match. Obviously, Grater can't make it, and Kodiak "wins" by forfeit. The next week, Grater is still at the hospital, standing watch with Mike Haggar. Kodiak beats up a female mannequin dressed up to look like Grater, giving himself another "win". When Grater gets back, there's hell to pay. Kodiak keeps taunting, even calling Grater a "loser". Grater beats the crap out of Kodiak numerous times. On the Massacre before Crash Carnival, they each cost each other victories, Grater helping Cody win in a Last Man Standing bout, while Kodiak costs Grater a table match with Skarzz.

Ghost vs Cody Simmons

Cody, knowing Haggar has Scorpion and knowing that Slade is entitled to a rematch against Skarzz, makes Ghost his target. One week, Ghost calmly shows up at the hospital and doesn't attack Cody. He merely tells him that it's only a matter of time before he gets to Jessica, and there's nothing he can do about it. Ghost gets more demented every week, getting Cody angrier and more possessive of Jessica.

Jack Slade vs Skarzz

Slade wants two things: Revenge for what Skarzz did to Jessica and the World Title back. Scorpion's plan is simple: destroy Haggar himself and have Skarzz destroy the kid who could carry on his legacy. Various attacks lead to a massive attack on the Massacre before Crash Carnival, where Skarzz costs Slade a match with Scorpion, hitting him in the head repeatedly with a chair. It should be noted that Slade still is suffering the effects of his broken orbital socket and, even though he had some surgery done in Toronto to repair it, he keeps making things worse for himself by not taking time off. After the attack by Skarzz, Slade is diagnosed with a major concussion and is urged not to wrestle at Crash Carnival. Slade signs a waiver, absolving the SMWA of any wrong doing, and letting him take on Skarzz for the belt.

The Mike Haggar Farewell Tour

Yes, you read that correctly. The week after Ghost's attempted assault at Toronto General, Mike Haggar gives an interview from the hospital. He tells the world he has a lot of decisions to make, and how he can deal with this business when it can get so personal and cost him so much. The next week on Massacre, Mike Haggar announces that Crash Carnival '99 will be his last match. However, he doesn't want his revenge to end with Scorpion. He wants every member of Major Force to suffer for what they did to Jessica. Scorpion responds to Haggar's announced "retirement" with a measure that will truly piss him off: He decides not to come anywhere near Haggar, letting him face everybody in Major Force except for him. Haggar first defeats Skarzz in a cage match (non-title), making a dramatic escape for a win. The next week, it's Haggar and Grater against Kodiak and Scorpion, who is forced into the match by Jack McCullough, who does everything he can to make sure Scorpion's power is curbed going in to Crash Carnival. Scorpion avoids Haggar all match, fully infuriating him. Then, Haggar gets a crack at Ghost. It's after this match is done that Scorpion resorts to the trick he first used to nail Haggar - the rail jumpers. With Slade incapacitated and Grater and Cody brawling with the rest of the Force, ten very large men jump out of the crowd and attack Mike Haggar. Security is blocked by the brawl between the rest of Counterstrike and the Force, and Mike Haggar suffers quite the beating going in to Crash Carnival.

Crash Carnival 1999
Slam Masters: Crash Preparations (Saturday before Crash)

Here, several smaller feuds are settled. Here's the rundown.

Quasar defeats Nord Fullstrom, who was drawn for three Luck of the Draw matches, losing each one. Fullstrom told everybody he'd retire if he lost this rematch to Quasar.
The Dragon Raiders (Ultimate Spider and Dragon De Fuego) defeated Overcompensators Anonymous. This was a three-way feud, but Actor broke away from Fuego and BC-2000 quit the SMWA. Spider and Fuego decided to join forces.
Lantern defeated Teknos in a mask vs mask match. When Lantern won, it meant Teknos had to now wrestle with his mask forever more.
The Kunitsukami defeated the Philadelphia X-Treme Machine - spillover from the above mentioned PXM - Amatsu alliance.
Jerry Kent defeated Angus Wallace

Also, the winners of Camp SMWA were announced. I'd like to especially apologize now for not having time to keep everybody updated on the camp, and for the fact that your characters may not see a website (mine, anyway) any time soon.

Here are the winners...

Tag Team: The Pride
Cruiserweights: Spreak and Dan Suther
Heavyweights: Rorschach, Zack Archer and Dredd

If anybody would like to know where their guys finished, please contact me and I will give you the details. Again, thanks for sending them in.

Crash Carnival: The Matches

Rokuru vs Paul Milo

Rokuru brings the Cruiserweight Title, while Milo brings the pieces of Teddy in a bag. The match is a fight throughout, with Milo eventually winning after a beautiful flurry of counters at the end and a missed three count by a referee who was badly out of position. However, things didn't go so well for Milo. As he grabbed Teddy and headed for the back, the entire SMWA Cruiserweight division (even Teknos) came out and chased Milo back into the ring. Milo, fearing the beating of his life, tossed Teddy to Rokuru, and we had a happy reunion.

Andrew Marshall vs The Dark Brand

Just a spectacular match overall. Marshall wins it in a show stealer.

Deadline vs Amatsu

Two big, invincible monsters in a match that was reminiscent of Skarzz vs Doomsday. Deadline took it in the end when interference by Zists and Iznami backfired. After the match, those three were effectively sent away by Deadline, who made a pledge to remain in the SMWA to "maintain the balance", a mission which would become clear months down the road.

The Flying Scotsman vs Ron Grayson

Grayson fights an uphill battle from the start on this one after missing a high spot to the outside. The Scotsman, seemingly, has many opportunities to win it, but he keeps beating Grayson down. Monica begins to get upset at ringside, with old feelings for Grayson apparently bubbling to the surface. Grayson fights back and tears into the Scotsman. Eventually, after a heated fight, Monica can't take it. She rushes into the ring and gets between both men. She backs the Scotsman off first, and then goes to Grayson. Luring him into a false sense of security, Monica goes for a knee to the groin. Grayson blocks the knee, picks Monica up and tosses her into the Scotsman. Soon after, Grayson takes the match with the Shooting Star Legdrop, leaving Monica humiliate and the Scotsman very angry.

Doomsday vs King Rasta

Rasta fights his fiercest match since the last time he lost Bobby, only this time, his efforts are thwarted by Bobby's constant interference. Wanting to humiliate Rasta before he finished him off, Doomsday allowed Bobby one last shot. Bobby took his infamous golden banana and jabbed Doomsday in the throat! A stunned Doomsday fell victim to a sunset flip by Rasta and was pinned! Rasta tossed Doomsday out of the ring and then, Bobby and Rasta, thick as thieves, hugged in the ring. This was all some kind of a set-up on their part, and it worked.

"Titan" Tim Redbury vs West Bronco

An excellent match. Titan ups the ferocity mid-way, taking shortcuts to try and down Bronco. West holds tight, though, and eventually finishes the match off with a flying lariat. Afterwards, there is a mutual show of respect between Titan and Bronco, even though you can tell Titan is pissed as hell that he didn't' win the match.

Ghost vs Cody Simmons

Cody fights with his heart. Ghost fights with his head. It's a great match, but Cody tires himself out, spending too much time beating on Ghost and not attempting to go for the win. After a botched top rope spot led to Cody being put through a table with a top rope backdrop driver, it was only a matter of time. Cody kicked out of almost everything, including two Final Breaths, but Ghost pinned him after turning a cross body attempt into a Northern Lights Bomb.

Rick Clark vs Terry Sky

It's Iron Man rules. Clark gets himself disqualified at the ten minute mark for nailing Sky in the head repeatedly with a chair. Clark is down 1-0, but Sky is unconscious. Clark uses that to his advantage, picking up three wins on an unconscious Sky. Purely on instinct, Sky manages to surprise Clark with a Lights Out, raising the tally to 3-2 for Clark. Both men are out, and Clark is up and dominates once more until Sky pulls off at surprise German suplex at the fifteen minute mark! It's 3-3! The final five minutes of the match are insane, moving at a non-stop pace. Both men hit their finishers but are too tired to cover. In the final minute, moves are traded at an insane pace, nobody getting the duke. Clark makes a last ditch Sky-Driver attempt, but Sky blocks and hits a Lights Out at 19:55. The cover is made. Sky wins 4-3 and leaves a beaten Clark in the ring. Terry Sky officially gets back in the SMWA. Match of the night.

Alexander "The Grater" vs Kodiak Marmoset

We went from a technical masterpiece to outright brutality. This was going to be the hardcore spotfest of the night, but I usually don't plan them out. Let's just say this one would have made the Rolling Thunder match look like a schoolyard brawl. I planned on ending it with a massive double table spot, with Grater hitting a Doomsday Tornado off of a ladder. Afterwards, Grater gets the crowd chanting "loser".

The All-Americans vs The Eastern Powers

A brawl, with attempts at submission being made only when one man was incapacitated. Chad Hillsman attempted to repeat what he did at New Year's Smash, trying to handcuff Zangief to the ropes. However, Zangief fought back and, in the end, it was Hillsman who was cuffed! Zangief tried to do what Hillsman did to him at NYS - beat Gunloc enough for Hillsman to give up. However, Hillsman refused. It didn't matter, though. Gunloc beat Hillsman to it. The War of the Super Powers was over, with Biff and Zangief getting a Submission victory. Referees freed Hillsman from his handcuffs, at which point he proceeded to beat the hell out of his tag team partner while yelling "Traitor" at the top of his lungs.

Jack Slade vs Skarzz

In the kind of logic that can only happen in wrestling, Jack Slade fights for twenty minutes with a concussion. Skarzz dominates him. Slade gets his shots in, but finds them very ineffective. He can't get anything more than a one count. Slade hits Skarzz with everything, a Concussion Bomb on the floor, a TV camera, a piledriver on the ramp. Nothing. Skarzz finally gains control, hitting the Skarring. Saul Masters then hands him a chair, and Skarzz goes to town. Eight chair shots and a Skarring later, Skarzz makes the pin. TWO COUNT!!! Stunned, Skarzz picks Slade up. Slade uses all he has to hit a spinebuster bomb, dropping Skarzz on the chair. Skarzz gets up quick and picks up Slade, who crawls between Skarzz's legs and grabs the chair. Slade smashes Skarzz in the leg then in the head about nine times. Slade hits the Spiked DDT on the chair and goes for the cover. TWO COUNT!!! Skarzz gets up fast. Slade hits him with three more chair shots before another Spiked DDT! This time, Slade goes up to the top ropes, barely able to balance himself. Skarzz gets up, Slade hits him with a flying cross body. Skarzz catches Slade, but Slade hits some powerful elbows into Skarzz's temple, knocking him down. Slade holds on for dear life and gets the three!!! Jack Slade is the World Champion again and Skarzz has been pinned for the very first time! Slade knocks Skarzz from the ring with the World Title, and Masters pulls his charge away.

Mike Haggar vs The Scorpion

The feud ends in the city where it begins. It's an absolute slugfest to start things out, and neither man can keep the advantage too long. However, Scorpion gets a massive edge when he ducks a Haggar lariat. He stands up, grabs Haggar's arm and runs it full force into the cage. It's very obvious at that point that something has happened to Haggar's left elbow, as it swells up very quickly and Haggar has trouble using it. Scorpion beats Haggar down with the telescopic nightstick he brought to the ring, and then he pulls a wrench out of his boots. Scorp begins taking apart a piece of the cage, ending up with a long piece of metal which was used to help keep the cage steady. Scorpion uses the metal on Haggar, scraping it on his forehead and even trying to impale him with it by coming off of the second buckle. Haggar fights back, but Scorpion gets the edge back. He tries to escape, but Haggar manages to pull him off the cage with a one armed back suplex. Haggar is trying to use his left arm, but it isn't working one bit. Still, he fights with everything he has, taking his chances where he can get them. Scorpion hits the Whiptail and attempts an escape, but Haggar blocks him. Scorp hits the move again, but this time is content to beat on Haggar afterwards. Scorpion climbs up to the top of the cage and attempts a flying headbutt. Haggar moves, and for a minute, neither man can stand. In the meantime, the cage continues to take a beating, the side that Scorpion took apart with his wrench showing obvious signs of strain. Both men get up and Haggar fights back with a huge flurry of punches and kicks. He somehow manages to hit the Screwdriver and slowly climbs to the door. Down to the ring come Major Force, and Skarzz slams the cage door on Haggar's arm. Within seconds, though, something amazing happens...

The New York crowd cheers as Jessica Haggar steps out of the dressing room! She waves her arm, and everybody that Scorpion has tried to manipulate comes to the ring. Counterstrike, Terry Sky, Simply the Best, The Eastern Powers, Chad Hillsman... They all run to the ring, united for just the few moments necessary to get Major Force away. Jessica Haggar stands at ringside, yelling words of encouragement to her dad as Counterstrike leads the attack to get the Force away from ringside. Both Scorpion and Haggar get up, only to floor each other with a double clothesline. Both men are down, with Scorpion getting up first. He sees Jessica and immediately starts climbing the cage in her direction. Mike Haggar sees his daughter, sees Scorpion and follows him up. Scorpion makes it to the top of the cage and climb over, but Mike Haggar has made record time to get up there and catch him. The two trade punches on the side of the cage, that particular wall beginning to sway. Jessica, seeing this, runs out of the way. Haggar grabs Scorpion by the mask in an attempt to pull him back in. The pain in his arm isn't bothering him now, the adrenaline is that high. Haggar pulls Scorp half over the top, and with one yank, Scorpion's mask comes off. Haggar takes one final look at his nemesis and then performs the spot of a lifetime. He hooks Scorpion up for the ride.... SCREWDRIVER OFF THE TOP OF THE CAGE!!! Just at this point, the cage give way, fortunately falling somewhat inward and not of the crowd. Scorpion hits the mat hard and has no chance of getting up, most likely ever (not dead, though a vegetable). Mike Haggar gets up after ten seconds, walks over to the hole in the cage and steps out to the floor.

Tears in his eyes, he embraces his daughter, having finally defeated the nemesis that has tormented them all their lives. The New York crowd gets the honour of giving Mike Haggar his final farewell....

    So, that's my big event. The SMWA does go on after that, but that's a story for another time... (i.e. look for something on the message board in a few days about possible angles).
    Well, like I said earlier, it's time for those goodbyes. First of all, I want to say I really did enjoy this. As much of a hassle as the SMWA became for school, more often than not, I wished I could leave school and work on this than the other way around. It means a lot to me, and I'm glad it meant a lot to you people.

SMWA: The Acknowledgements

I'm going to thank some people for helping me along the way. If I don't mention your name, PLEASE tell me, and I'll write it in. I don't want anybody to be forgotten.

JT Icefire. The guy who knew about Mike Haggar's retirement last summer. Wanna know who named Simply the Best? Thank JT. This guy was the unofficial second man on this fed so many times. JT, thanks for being such a great guy and so much help.

Mr Intensity. Joe, you were probably my most insane fan, but you were also the guy who kept me on my toes. A positive review from you meant something at all times. Thanks for helping me get a handle on Kodiak, too, a character who I had no idea what to do with.

Lee Kelsall. Always there to engage in a silly conversation, always there to poke fun at my fed in his covert way. Lee, I got one question for ya? How are you going to spoil my results if your WWF actually makes it to May '99? =0)

Graeme McGaw. He's the dude who IS the Scotsman, and he also helped me out with the lovely SMWA logo. Much better than my impact font, Graeme. Thanks.

Mike Farrow. Another guy who I let in on my thought process, and the sometimes writer of SMWA This Week =0). A truly great guy.

David Hawkins, who sorta served as my unofficial watchdog several times. Thanks for pointing the things out that other people wouldn't mention, Dave. And thanks for Ghost.... And Archer.... And Spreak....

There are so many other people out there who deserve props. Thank to Pete Dadiras and Shane Roberson for helping me with the past cards. Mike Waldrop for offering his input and that one great Ghost interview before he lost CPU privileges. =0) To Greg Blaxland, for offering to help at every turn. To my dad, who will probably never read this, but without his computer to start, this thing never would have got running. To Big Cat for nearly giving me a heart attack by leaking the Scorpion return (no grudges). To Nam for getting me those Slammasters pics. To Capcom for giving me the idea. To Oliver Copp for creating TNM. Again, if I'm forgetting you, please let me know, and you'll be here.

I'm never going to forget this, folks. Hopefully, this won't be the last you here of me and the folks in the SMWA. Who know, maybe someday, you'll see a "Tricky" Rick Clark or a Dark Brand in the WWF who's actually a kid from Toronto who ran a little thing on the internet a while back. We can all dream.
I guess, aside from thank you once more, there's only one thing left to say....

SMWA 4 EVER!!!

James Kirk McCullough